This is a subject that many people, including me, have a hard time with. I don’t really have a hard time forgiving others who may have hurt me in the past, but forgiving myself is another thing altogether. It is also hard to fathom forgiving someone who has abused children or even killed children, especially yours or someone else’s. I know that God can do this and if we truly follow His teachings and give our hearts to Jesus and let Him forgive others through us, then maybe that forgiveness is possible.
But, forgiving myself for some wrong that I know that I did in the past is a hard thing to do sometimes. God does tell us to let Him have our hearts and He will wash away those pains and hurts which happened in the past. But, it still takes some effort on our part to truly forgive either myself or someone else.
By effort I mean that we have to pray and ask Him to help us to forgive completely because we can’t do it on our own. Depending upon the hurt or the pain caused, forgiveness is one of the hardest parts of being a Christian. Forgiveness of other people as well as forgiving our own behavior from times past.
Please, seek forgiveness from God for your own sins, mistakes, and anything else you have done. He provided the grace and mercy for you on the cross through Jesus, all that you need to do is accept it as the gift that it is and learn to forgive. Sometimes that learning curve can take a while, so seek Him daily.