In an earlier post on another of my sites this morning, I was talking about this idea of independence. Those of us who live in America have embraced this idea for most of our lives. We have watched movies and read about how our country fought for its independence many years ago. We have also been taught to be independent in one way or another in our lives, whether it is being this way from our parents or just able to do things “on our own”.
The biggest problem with independence, especially with men, is that we take it seriously. We act as if we don’t need anyone and sometimes we take that to the extreme. So much so that we even push our parents, our siblings, even our spouses away at times. Sometimes we will push so hard that we end up being truly alone and isolated. That is not how God created us to be.
We need each other. We need a woman as our spouse in order to have a son or a daughter to fulfill God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply”. We need friends, male friends. To keep us on track in our lives and in our relationships, with each other and with our families.
It is great that some men can go out into the wilderness and live, alone, with no other person to help them. But, after a while being alone is not good. Even “God said that it is not good for the man to be alone“. He did not create us to be alone, whether we are married or single. If you are Christian, seek out someone who is a Christian too. Men, start a Bible study group for men. Meet in each other’s homes or meet at church and bring pizza and some Coke or Dr. Pepper or something. Discuss what is going on your lives in context with your study, then pray about it. Make sure that each man in the group has the other’s phone numbers just in case you need to talk.
Because, you know men do talk to each other. We don’t grunt like apes or fight like dogs, we actually do have conversations which don’t center around which team is going to the playoffs. Men, whether you admit it to yourself or not you know that you need this and your son needs it too. Include him in your group, because sitting at home talking to mom is not the same as talking to Dad, even if it is during a Bible study session. It needs to be done during a Bible study session because you are the high priest in your home or at least you are supposed to fill that function according to the Bible.
Don’t neglect your duty as a father, a husband, a friend or as a spiritual leader in your house because who else can fill those roles if it isn’t you?